MUNNA BHAI JOKES

PROFESSOR :Gandhi Jayanti ke baray mein kya jante ho?

MUNNA BHAI :Gandhi bahut zabardast aadmi tha, Baap. Maa Kasam, par apun ko yeh nehin maloom ke yeh Jayanti kaun hai.

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CIRCUIT :Bhai, Bapu ne bola tha ke kabhi jhoot nehin bolna mangta hai. Apun aaj se kabhi jhoot nehin bolega Bhai.

MUNNA BHAI :Aye Circuit, woh Sabrina ka baap aya hai tere ko dund rehla hai.

CIRCUIT :Bhai usko bolo apun gaoon gayea hai, kheti karne ko.

MUNNA BHAI :Par Circuit, abhi to tu bola kabhi jhoot nehin bolega.

CIRCUIT :Bhai, apun jhoot nehin bolega, par tum to bol sakta hai na.

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MAMU :Chand toh raat ko nikalta hai, aaj din mein kaise nikal aya?

GIRL :Ullu to raat ko bolta hai, aaj din mein kaise bol pada?

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CIRCUIT :Bhai, woh apnay bachpan ka dost aarehla hai aaj raat ko dinner pe. Mera sara chain collection apnay kamray mein chupa do na please.

MUNNA BHAI :Kyun tera dost chor hai kya?

CIRCUIT :Nehin Bhai, woh apnay chain pechan lega.

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MAMU :Bhai, apnay ko char mahinay mein Sindhi sikhna padega. Kuch hal batao.

MUNNA BHAI :Kannada kyun, aur char mahinay ka kya chakkar hai?

MAMU :Meinay ek Sindhi baccha adopt kiya hai, aur woh char mahinay mein bolne lagay ga.

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PROFESSOR :Akal badi ki bhais?

MUNNA BHAI :Bole toh pehlay date of birth bata mamu.

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MUNNA BHAI :Circuit, bole toh yeh Ford kya hai?

CIRCUIT :Bhai, gaadi hai.

MUNNA BHAI :Toh phir, yeh Oxford kya hai?

CIRCUIT :Bole toh, simple hai bhai, Ox mane Bael, Ford mane gaadi. Oxford bole toh Baelgaadi.

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Circuit takes a flight to Singapore and he is seated next to an Englishman. Circuit open his tiffin and serves himself a roti.

ENGLISHMAN :What is this?

CIRCUIT :Bread India. Circuit then open the box of jalebi.

ENGLISHMAN :What is this?

CIRCUIT :Sweet India. With all the food he hogged on, Munna farts. The Englishman is offended and in shock asks ...

ENGLISHMAN :What is that?

CIRCUIT :Air India

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CIRCUIT :Aye Mamu, tereko papad aur jhapad mein pharak pata hai kya?

MAMU :Nehin.

CIRCUIT :To kha ke dekh le, pata chal jayega.

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MUNNA BHAI :Mamu, apun bachpan mein dus maley ke building se gir gaya tha.

MAMU :Aarey, phir kya hua. Bach gaya ki tapak gaya?

MUNNA BHAI :Yaad nahin hai yaar. Bahut purani baat hai.

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MUNNA BHAI :Mamu, tu kitna padha hai?

MAMU :B.A.

MUNNA BHAI :Sala, two lafz padha aur woh bhi ulta?

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MAMU :Oye, maar gayea yaar. Meri biwi aur premika saath saath aa rehla hain.

MAMU KA DOST :Arrey, mein bhi yehi bolnewala tha.

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CIRCUIT :Oye Short Circuit yeh light bulb pe baap ka naam kya likh raha hai?

SHORT CIRCUIT :Apun baap ka naam roshan kar rehle hai.

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PRINCIPAL :Agar koi ladka girls hostel mein gaya toh first time 100 Rs fine, 2nd time 200 Rs. Fine and 3rd time 500.

MUNNA BHAI :Boley to Monthly paas ka kya lega Mamu.

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